My Partner and I Met in the Swingers Lifestyle. Can You Give Us Some Guidance?
- Mizzy Bender
- 5 days ago
- 3 min read
My Partner and I Met in the Swingers Lifestyle. Can You Give Us Some Guidance?
My partner and I met in the swingers lifestyle. Can you give us some guidance?
Absolutely, it would be my pleasure!
I recommend putting a pause on your swingers lifestyle activity for a while. First and foremost, you want to focus on building your relationship without any outside noise. To have a strong swingers relationship, one needs to have strong communication, understanding and trust. These things are built over time and should not be rushed just to swing. Put your priority where it belongs.... in your relationship. Make sure your partner feels completely valued before exploring further.
You're going to have to learn that what you once knew as a single is not going to be the same as a couple
You are going to have to realign completely. What are your wants, needs and desires as an individual and as a couple. Make sure you are fully transparent in your communications. Do so with an easy tone and accepting mindset, providing a safe space for your partner to communicate their responses back.
I love recommending a paper and pen exercise where you actually write out your wants, needs and desires as a single and as a couple, then discuss the list with your partner. Making a list creates intention. You have to be more mindful when you sit and write verses trying to have a conversation off the fly. It is deep self reflection in such an honest and positive way.
You will most likely have many conversations before becoming completely aligned on your path forward. That is ok. Don't rush the process. You want to make sure you are setting your relationship up for success. Life is a journey, not a marathon. Enjoy the process of connecting with your partner on a deep emotional level. This type of connection grows your relationship so much stronger, creating so much more passion and desire.
Once you decide to make your move, make sure you have continuous touch points with your partner along the way. You never know what your emotions truly will be until you are in the moment, doing the deed. Please have a solid touch base after your swinger swap to discuss your emotions, and overall experience. This is the time to tweak any boundaries you may need, or implement ones you didn't know you needed.
Take your time. When the stars and moon align, you will know you want to swing.
If you’d like to explore more, my blogs are full of personal stories, resources, and thought-starters to help you and your partner navigate this path. You can also reach me directly through mizzybender.com — the safest and most authentic place to connect with me.
Until next time, I will talk to you super soon.
Xoxo,
Mizzy
Mizzy Unfiltered – your chance to ask me anything without holding back. From relationships and lifestyle to personal growth and everything in between, nothing is off-limits.
Your submission is 100% anonymous – no names, no judgment, just raw and real talk. Each week, I’ll pick one question to answer in my advice column on Sundays, 7am via my blog.
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Background: Who doesn’t love to talk about sex and everything in between? Mizzy Bender is here to talk through all the down, dirty and not so fun moments that life has to offer. Mizzy is one female that isn’t afraid to embrace all aspects of life from sexuality to success.
Mizzy Bender is a 42 year old female entrepreneur and influencer leading the way within the Swingers / Adult Lifestyle community. If you believe in Ethical Non-Monogamy, this is the community for you. Mizzy’s journey started out with Mindbender Parties and still remains traveling the East Coast putting on full thematic swinger events with her partner in crime, Mr. Mindbender.
Mizzy’s passion and drive is all about creating an environment that is all inclusive and judgment free, where we can be who we are without question. Where one can have a platform to talk about the things we are curious about without question, finding like minded humans to love and support one another.
Through this journey, Mizzy's Boutique was formed. An adult novelty shop starting out online and has since migrated into a traveling pop up boutique at swingers / alternative lifestyle events across the US.
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