A Hunting Knife and a House Full of Red Flags
- Feb 11
- 5 min read
Updated: Mar 5
A Hunting Knife and a House Full of Red Flags: My Journey into Ethical Non-Monogamy
Well, this is a story I never thought I would write. But here we are…
The Unexpected Guest
One particular day, my ex-husband came home from work. Or maybe we were carpooling. I can't remember for sure. He mentioned that someone new had come in to interview. This wasn’t unusual; turnover in his shop was frequent. But the part that threw me was that this guy was homeless. My ex offered him a place to stay in our home. I’M SORRY… WHAT DID YOU SAY?
I don’t recall exactly how it happened, but the next thing I knew, this guy was at our house, ready to camp out in our unfinished basement. I was beyond myself. This man literally lived in the woods behind the local mall strip. I was freaking out. No offense to anyone that is homeless, but obviously, I was concerned. Is this person mentally sound? Is he going to murder us? Is he a drug addict? What the heck? Why was he homeless? My mind was spinning.
At this point, I had already moved my stepson from his room upstairs to my bedroom downstairs due to another detrimental situation. But that’s a story for another blog.
A Disturbing Gift
Later that evening, around 8:30 PM, my ex officially set up the guy in the basement. Before heading down to hang with him, he came to me and handed me a huge hunting knife to keep under my pillow. It looked large enough to slice someone down the center if I needed to. I looked at him, stunned. Seriously? Are you really giving me this knife? Don’t you see the horror in this? Don’t you see how disturbing this is?
With this new fear instilled in me, I quickly thought about my stepson, knowing he was one floor above this potential psychopath. After receiving the knife, I rushed to his room and forcefully instructed him to lock the door and put something against it. He was directed not to open the door unless he specifically heard my voice. Until then, he was to stay put and DO NOT GO ANYWHERE.
That night, the two of them spent their time wasted on the basement floor.
Seeking Validation
The next day, as soon as I got to work, I went to the head of HR. I told her exactly what happened the night before. I needed validation from someone outside my living situation that this was crazy. My feelings of safety and concern were flying high. I couldn’t tell if I was overreacting. That seemed more insane than the actual event itself.
The head of HR looked at me with serious concern. She said, “YES, this is insane. No, it is not normal to be given a knife to sleep with just in case. No. No. No.” None of this is normal. She asked me if they were still at the house. I told her I didn’t know. I came to the office as soon as my stepson left for school. I made sure he and I were out of the house as soon as we could get somewhere else.
The Plan of Action
Together, the head of HR and I decided that I would wait until after 9 AM, when we knew the two drunks should be out of the house, to go back and check if they had actually left. I was going to drive by, checking to see if my ex's vehicle was home. If not, my mission was to go inside, hide all my stuff, and lock all the doors I had access to.
I was relieved to see that they made it to work. What I didn’t know was that this ridiculous scene would last a few days. Eventually, I went completely crazy, making it well known that this was beyond messed up and they needed to get the hell out. The rage inside of me boiled like water, becoming fiercer until I built enough steam to fight the battle, preparing for whatever would happen.
The Aftermath
Thankfully, there were no repercussions. It was just another insane moment in my household to process and tuck away as if nothing ever happened.
Embracing Ethical Non-Monogamy
So, you're curious about ethical non-monogamy, or maybe you're already deep into the lifestyle? Awesome! I'm here to spill the tea, share my personal stories, and hook you up with seriously good educational resources. Think of me as your go-to... a judgment-free zone where we connect. Plus, Mizzy's Boutique has got some choice curated novelty products, and Mindbender Parties? Oh honey, those are for experiencing the lifestyle firsthand. Let's do this!
Until next time, I will talk to you super soon.
Xoxo,
Mizzy
The stories and experiences shared on this blog reflect my personal journey, memories, and perspective. Everything I share here represents my truth, told through my eyes and heart. This content is deeply personal, and out of respect, it should not be copied, shared, or reproduced in any manner without explicit permission. Each individual mentioned in my stories has played a significant role in my life—people I have deeply cared for, still care for, and hold respect toward. My intention is never to harm, offend, or disrespect anyone. Instead, my aim is to honestly share my experiences, thoughts, and emotions from my personal viewpoint. Please read these stories understanding that this is solely my perspective, and others involved may see or remember these moments differently. Thank you for respecting my story and those within it.
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Background:
Who doesn’t love to talk about sex and everything in between? Mizzy Bender is here to discuss all the down, dirty, and not-so-fun moments that life has to offer. Mizzy is one female who isn’t afraid to embrace all aspects of life, from sexuality to success.
Mizzy Bender is a 42-year-old female entrepreneur and influencer leading the way within the Swingers/Adult Lifestyle community. If you believe in Ethical Non-Monogamy, this is the community for you. Mizzy’s journey started with Mindbender Parties and continues as she travels the East Coast, hosting full thematic swinger events with her partner in crime, Mr. Mindbender.
Mizzy’s passion is all about creating an inclusive and judgment-free environment. Here, we can be who we are without question, finding like-minded humans to love and support one another.
Through this journey, Mizzy's Boutique was formed. An adult novelty shop that started online and has since migrated into a traveling pop-up boutique at swingers/alternative lifestyle events across the US.
oh honey, no wonder he's an Ex. Nobody should have to live in fear